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Scottish Lessons for Mike P

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#1 Wed, 04/06/2014 - 21:19
Scott
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Scottish Lessons for Mike P

Mike,

I thought you better brush up on your linguistic skills if you are crossing the border.

SCOTS are renowned for their unique and wonderful sense of humour.

But for those outside of Scotland, it can often be hard to understand jokes which include the Scots dialect.

Check out our list of eight jokes only Scots would understand:

1. A Glasgow woman goes to the dentist and settles down in the chair.

"Comfy?" asks the dentist.

"Govan," she replies.

2. How many Spanish guys does it take to change a light bulb?

Just Juan.

3.Did you hear about the lonely prisoner?

He was in his cell.

4. After announcing he was getting married, a boy tells his pal he will be wearing the kilt.

"And what's the tartan?" asks his mate.

"Oh, she'll be wearing a white dress," he replies.

5. Ten cows in a field. Which one is closest to Iraq?

Coo eight.

6. A teenage girl phones her dad at midnight and says: "Can you come and get me? I've missed the last bus and it's pouring with rain."

"Okay," says her dad. "Where are you ringing from?"

The girl replies: "From the top of my head right down to my knickers".

7. What did the Siamese twins from Glasgow call their autobiography?

Oor Wullie.

8. A man takes a pair of shoes back to the shop and complains that there is a lace missing.

"No", argues the assistant, "look at that - it says Taiwan".

 

 

Wed, 04/06/2014 - 21:36
ElmaA
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Nice one understood it all....

time you started your new job !!!

Elma 

Thu, 05/06/2014 - 06:44
Mike
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I completly understood and agreed with all you said Elma. Didn't understand the the first post at all.

 
 
 
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Thu, 05/06/2014 - 10:40
duetto
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Thu, 05/06/2014 - 16:37
Brian C
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Quick change of subject people, I was woundering if we could put aside some time  to discuss our care  in Scotland, ie only DHE, no Lidocaine infusion, waiting times etc, I think we should at least ask our local MPs to attend or write to them a letter, I don't now about Sept 2014 but it scares the beegeesusce out of me. I am fortunate that my wife and cousin have fought hard for me and my MP Derek McKay know's me (or my wife and cousin) our even a quick talk about setting something up in Scotland to apply to the Scottish Parliement (yes Mike that's probably another word you don't understand)regarding the lack of resources up hear.

 

C U SOON

 

B   :p

Thu, 05/06/2014 - 18:09 (Reply to #5)
Scott
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There seems to be some disparagy regarding east coast and west coast, To put you in the picture when I went back to get my O2 script sorted out I was seen within a week just before Christmas and im led to believe Lindocane Infusions were being discussed at Dundee. (however I am yet to confirm if my friend was offered it) 

At the minute and I have set some time aside to discuss 'Scottish issues' that we can then take to the head of the NHS and Scottish Government. ;) Dont worry the Athorities don't get an easy time from OUCH.

Infusion Therapy will be added to the list of 

Im happy for you to invite you MP's or MSP's (its the MSP's that have the power over the NHS in Scotland) If they are willing to attend can you email me (scott(at)ouchuk.org) and I will add them to the guest list.

 

 

 

Fri, 06/06/2014 - 19:01 (Reply to #6)
Mike
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I am extremely concerned about the attitude of the PCT's and the GP's in Scotland. I have had some very serious telephone conversations with Ayr PCT who have followed up a problem with a GP in Ayr who refuses to give a suicidal member O2 or subcut triptans. They sent me an email marked

*** RESTRICTED - OFFICIAL - SENSITIVE ***

If the patient is unhappy with the treatment they are receiving to manage their condition they should complain direct to the practice as each practice has their own complaints process. I am sorry that this is not the answer you were hoping for.

Above is part of the email, not quite sure who they suggest its restricted too but it seems from the full email that The PCT have no say whatever anymore in making the GP give the patient the correct treatment for cluster headache. There appear to be a very real problem on cost when it comes to prescriptions. The patient for her part is very concerned that GP will kick her off his patients list so I believe doesn’t want to “rock the boat”, she is scared. I did want her to consider going on the Channel Four programme but that wont happen now. Certainly for the medium term I am very concerned about our Scottish members getting the BNF recommended medications and I really would like to stir it up in Scotland which is why its been added to the agenda at the  Scotland meeting.

 
 
 
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Fri, 06/06/2014 - 23:41
Brian C
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Well said, Mike

I feel the ignorance, of both doctors and nurses is becoming very serious in Scotland my last DHE took 55mins just to flush because they forgot about me I rang the bell came out of my room and it was only then that the nurses seen the bag drawing blood from my vain, it then took another hour and a half to get, which I consider a totally useless DHE. I am now waiting 7 months for my next one GOD HELP US ALL

Sat, 07/06/2014 - 09:55
Phil
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So, regarding duty of care, complaints are unregulated and dealt with in-house?

Is there a level of incompetence below man slaughter that the Scottish PCT will involve themselves?

Or does one need to invoke the ancient right of trial by combat?

_________________________________________________________________________ Yeah I know, my coat's already on.

Sat, 07/06/2014 - 17:51 (Reply to #9)
Mike
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I am actually unsure what the Scottish PCT's are there for if its no longer in thier remit to look after GPs bugets to look after the budgets. I'm sure if asked there will be a reason to justify their jobs.

 
 
 
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Sat, 07/06/2014 - 18:07
Brian C
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Mike each town looks after its own money,I only foound that out when after a year of writing e-mails, etc that I contacted my local councilor noow D McKay MP, he got me my funding within ten days, you need to remember there is no PCT's in Scotland,get there local councilors to find out whow things happen, because I have heard one or two very diffrent stories.

Brian

PS

Although I was treated in Glasgow it was Renfrewshire Health Care who paid my fees

Sun, 08/06/2014 - 17:44
Mike
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Brian the discussions I have had marked above

*** RESTRICTED - OFFICIAL - SENSITIVE ***

were from the office below, I know I dont speak fluent Scottish :) but the address includes "Primary Care" twice. Is this not a Primary Care Trust?

Primary Care Manager – GMS

Primary Care Development Team

Eglinton House

Ailsa Hospital

Dalmellington Road

AYR

 

 
 
 
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